INFJ Stress: What Overwhelms INFJs (and Handling It)

INFJ Stress: What Overwhelms INFJs (and Handling It)

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100 thoughts on “INFJ Stress: What Overwhelms INFJs (and Handling It)”

  1. Man, I started this vid like yesterday and intended to come back to it, but I should have watched it in its entirety as I had that exact freak out anticipatory moment today. I'm still glad I watched it even if a day late. I owe you a coffee. <3 angie. thanks FJ

  2. I'm an ISTP with a friend whose INFJ and most days she is stressed out and ranting. Usually I tell her to shut the fuck up and I'll tell her how to fix everything. As much as I come off as an asshole she said I'm one of the few people who can handle her shit. Opposites need each other in life I suppose.

  3. That last part of the video when you go into if you have two separate tasks totally different from each other and like to just handle one thing a day seriously hit home. Haven't heard someone explain that feeling so well, and haven't had someone else get the feeling either.

  4. Omg this video just so accurately explained why I just spend so much time on youtube, it's my way of "being in the present" but then I don't do work and stress myself out even more

  5. Honestly you're a prophet. I always complain about your channel being always about Infj.
    But I always come back to listen.
    Cuz I always learn sth new n original here.
    For example, you saying that some people aren't that refreshed wen they're told sth enlightening as they've always been like that anyway.
    It matches with my 1 of my philosophy.
    Like nothing's that special.
    #Entp confirmed every time but I wonder if I'm an infj????????

  6. I was just dealing with this today. I was watching the patriot act on Netflix. Learning about all the current issues in our world and of course feeling the giant need to take part in fixing them. While taking care of two moody babies. Then and also having my mother (who I'm currently fighting with) call me like 10 times in a row. I was on the verge of a panic attack. Though I now can recognize them and can calm myself down. I don't think a lot of other people would feel the same level of stress in the same situation.

  7. First I would like to say Nice Haircut.
    Another thing I'd like to say is "I Agree." I also do this especially with homework and classes and even future events that aren't here just yet. And you're also right there is like this push-pull kind of inner workings of the brain trying to make sense of things only to make it a whole lot more complicated. It happens to me. A. Lot. AND it really does sucks because it helps the little bit of anxiety that I may currently have or have at lower levels. However, my older sister actually kind of helps me take this feeling away by organizing what classwork I have to do and when it should be done by and it really helps. Then there are times during the year that I kind of naturally ease that little bit anxiety myself because of my hobby that I've picked up when I was younger and its drawing (which I use as a coping mechanism) or just being creative or even playing a really good adventure game helps too. My creative outlets or stimulating outlets help a lot when in these kind of situations because not only do I get out of my head and overthinking process but I get to go from cloud nine an slowly ease into what is currently important in the here and now.

  8. So here I am crying and feeling worthless. I'm so stressed with work. Hardly gotten any sleep for a week but then my bro told me I'm useless because I did not cook lunch. (I work at home). Needed to pull myself up since I feel like I'm sinking deeper deeper into my dark thoughts.

  9. I cannot believe how true this video is for me. I try to remember that it’s actually my problem and something I need to deal with when my kids are battering me non-stop. Too much stuff coming at me (any stuff, clutter, people, sounds, whatever) is absolutely stressful for me. This is such a relatable video. It helps to know that others go through it.

  10. even as a (strongly suspected) ENTJ i can relate
    it's less strong, like it need to be a lot of really big tasks before i get overwhelmed but when i do get there it also feels like the end of the world

    it doesn't help either that my mom is just reminding me of all of them every 2 steps that i take (she's an ENFJ and just want's the best for me though)
    after i saw this video i decided to talk that trough and now we have decided to bundle everything, take one moment in a day to just sum up everything i need to do and decide in what order i'm gonna do it, then i just focus on the task at hand (if there are parallel things i can split them up in smaller goals to do one by one)

    try it, it makes everything more manageable

  11. Apparently I’m a strange INFJ because the idea of my life being one thing for the rest of my life is truly terrifying, seriously are there any other INFJs out there that actually love change and always crave a new horizon?

  12. is it normal for INFJ's to wanting to "go out" and meet new people, but at the same time getting exhausted thinking about what you need to do in social bigger groups. like clubs, bars …… and actually find it waste of time going out, because you just sit and drink, and feel shit the next day.

  13. You’ve helped me out so much…I feel better about life right now and I feel a little better about myself – thanks Frank

  14. As an INFJ, I find working in a typical office setting is stressful all by itself. It's like being thrown into primordial soup of personalities. Most of the people aren't NF types, so they don't understand my need for scheduling out every single task, including the days that I designate as "do not disturb" so that the most important tasks will not be messed up. It never fails that someone higher up the ladder will completely disregard this and delegate assignments they either don't want to do or forgot about until the last minute. It feels like my boundaries are constantly being trampled.

  15. U R Friggn BRILLIANT_ ths coming from an INFP! Thank you soo very much for ths- even just to send to my tribe as a window into what they r dealing with involving me.Hugz & Kissez♦️

  16. Projecting in the future is seriously an issue for me. The difference is now doing meditation and being more aware I’m aware when I’m doing it and try to stay present and calm my anxiety.

  17. You already have my attention. Too many things coming to me all at once, which is like 3 things lol (on a good day), is too much for me. I feel like I'm going to cry or explode when I am overwhelmed.

  18. INFJ here.. what makes me overwhelmed the most is when people who openly say that they trust me. Because of that i always feel like i should never disappoint them, everything has to be perfect, and even do things beyond their expectation which i end up feeling drained 🙁 sometimes i feel guilty for myself because i can take care more of other people than of myself. Please if any of my fellow infj feels the same and find the way to solve it, i really want to hear your advise.

  19. Owh i have that when i notice that i've overslep the alarm clock and i'm going to be late. I hate it to be late, and when i notice it, i have so much stress that i can't handle things anymore. On that moment the only thing is cry, trilling over my whole body and falling on the ground because i can't stand anymore. Happenly i have family who help me when that happen, and it has never overcome me being late?. When i later look back to that moment i cannot deny that sometimes i think that is was really funny? sorry for my bad english but i'm comming from the netherlands

  20. Stress for me. People wanting instantaneous answers to complex questions. I usually hurt their feelings if not giving enough time to think.

  21. Whats amazing is when you just get stuff done and feel great….and you think to your self did I really do that, after the prolonged stress of thinking I should really get that done.

  22. Can you please tell me what the difference is between INFJs and empaths as I can't make up my mind which one I am. The more I learn about each one the more confused I get.

  23. Here's how I have worked my life to deal. I work 6 months and spend on only absolutely necessities. Then for the next 6 months I take off work and do nothing but go deep into myself and spiritual journey with what I made I live off that from the first 6 months of course this is accomplished by many means but it works and I absolutely love it. Its really balancing to my life. I say get creative with your life to balance it in anyway necessary and thats especially true for INFJ's for sure.

  24. Damn it really be like that.
    I feel like I'm always stressed and I've only recently figured out this whole INFJ stress and the stressors. Recently, I had several things on my plate for the future causing me stress for the present and preventing me from getting things done. It wasn't until the stuff happened that I felt relieved and able to work in the present. Too many stimuli as well. ?

  25. This was the last 2 years for me ???‍♀️. Dealing with one thing and something else comes up and you feel like you are just swating at gnats. It’s so exhausting. What you said about not being able to do anything during the day if you have a thing that night……happened to me last week! I had a function to go to at night…..literally an hour of my time and I felt completely off the whole day. It’s so frustrating. Being INFJ is exhausting.

  26. I totally agree. I feel overwhelmed at work because at any time I have 50 ongoing issues, plus multiple quick issues to resolve throughout the day, plus being pulled into meetings… So at the end of the day I want to be left alone and I unwind by stress eating.

  27. When you decide to make a coffee and change into a different outfit, then realise you need to pee.

    And you pause to map out the best possible order to do each thing:

    "Fill the Kettle"

    "Turn the Kettle on"

    "Then get changed. No, wait!"

    "First I'll pee, but I won't do my belt back up,

    because then I'm already partially finished changing clothes."


    While you're standing there looking vacant, someone asks you a question and your plans for the future explode.

  28. omg yes having two separate things to do that have nothing to do with each other SUCKS i never know what to do with myself i get so overwhelmed thinking about what im gonna do for both things at once

  29. I cant say thank you enough…Your words of wisdom are truly priceless….This for me is life changing. Even though I've heard bits and parts of it before …your explanation is perfect and your humor is a bonus LOL… "Stop the toilet from overflowing first." You always make me laugh out loud ?????

  30. Thank you for understanding, man. I'm learning not to run and ask for help. I guess like minds are thinking alike. "Patience Jung-Skywalker" ???.

  31. I was expecting a parcel to be delivered today, and I ended up sitting on the couch the whole day thinking about when is it gonna come. I couldn't concentrate on anything else, this video really spoke to me

  32. Me: INFJ and ADHD all things coming at me and me standing here like a samurai frozen in place. I just cant sometimes its horrible

  33. Good stuff, FJ! I feel this way a lot myself and I have savior Si. If I have an appointment in the afternoon, I’m in a state of suspended animation until the appointment is over. Only then may I carry on. It’s ridiculous . . .

  34. What stresses me out to no end as an INFJ (more of a INFJ-T)

    1. People wasting my time when I could have been more productive.
    2. Disingenuous, fake people.
    3. When people completely disregard on anything I say and will not rebuttal in the "I told you" situation.
    4. When people assume I can do multiple things all at once when I have multiple thoughts happening in parallel all at one already.
    5. When I make plans and I keep them secret in fear that they will sabotage my plans.
    6. People that question things in a nit picky way instead of a constructive way.
    7. When people keep asking for help that they usually can VERY easily handle themselves with a very small and easy obtainable amount of research.
    8. When in the rare times I say no, people guilt trip me into doing something that completely throws any plan into disarray.
    9. When I do a heavy amount of research into something and dissected the subject only to be belittled as it falls into the same thing in point 1.
    10. When any and all work I do is just completely disregarded when people see me do it with so much love and care and detail (sometimes taking hours), but people more "famous" do the same type of thing with usually minimal effort and/or quality and have people worshiping them like gods.

  35. So glad you’re creating this kind of more personal, introspective content again, Frank. This is why I first started following you! I’m an ENFP (the most introverted of the extroverted types✌??), not at INFJ, but I still relate very much to this video. I am close with INFJs in my life, I’m here for you guys! ?

  36. This definitely is a every day challenge for a “INFJ”,but how many of you realize because of your “Introverted intuition” that you spontaneously react to- say emergencies as soon as they start to happen? this happens because your subconscious already prepared you for what was coming.
    I have a perfect ie.. I was in mid flight once, and the stewardess just made her way to me and asked me what I would like,I asked her what brands of beer do you have-as soon as I said “I’ll take a Beck’s please”and she went to hand me the beer, I just automatically grabbed her with one hand, and the cart with the other, right exactly when insane turbulence started(prior to this,I was already in panic mode being on the plane in the first place)the man sitting next to me then after, reached around me, and grabbed the other end of the cart. I ended up with a free beer from that after it landed in my lap, and the stewardess told me “that was the worst turbulence she ever experienced”. Long story short- we might panic over minuscule things, but we don’t panic when it counts, so never underestimate yourselves (I have many stories like this)My best stress releaser I found years ago is “music” I throw in my ear buds and jam( “Death Metal” might make other’s react the opposite, but it soothes my brain.)

  37. Omg this puts words to the stress of adjusting to my new job. So many tasks I have a mini meltdown in my head but at the end of the day it's really nothing! One step at a time. I also love lamp.

  38. I have an infj friend who gets stressed out over everything. We were working on a project and it took him 30 minutes to come up with a title, as an enfj I was so concerned.

  39. Your right! I do get overwhelmed on stupid daily tasks that concern my life, I hate making phone calls, and dealing with people that hold the cards.

  40. I guess I have made it a habit to show myself how much time I have to get stuff done so I don’t stress about it too soon. It’s true that being present and taking things one at a time is helpful. Procrastinating as an INFJ would be hell, and that’s why I kicked that habit out as soon as possible when school difficulty was ramping up. I disagree that I have to just focus on one thing a day, I am a doer so I am okay with having multiple things to do in one day…. so long as it’s planned and I am prepared for it.

  41. I’m an INFJ. The only way I can be in the present moment is drugs, alcohol, sex, and…that’s about it. I need a healthy physical pleasure.

  42. Everything you say is always so real for me as an INFJ, it is very helpful to hear things about yourself that you already kind of know but now hearing someone else say it and cofirm it and provide some advise it helps me a lot. Thank you.

  43. You’re so handsome. As an INFJ with many talents and ambitions I find this to be spot on but extremely difficult too. Just thinking that after work I need to go to the gym, play the piano, do my vocal exercises and draw overwhelms me even though it’s only the morning and I haven’t done anything yet. Yet when I’m actually doing those activities I’m happy, so what the heck, brain?

  44. infj here. WOW, I've never noticed but that's actually spot on. Now that you've made me aware of it, that's exactly what keeps happening to me. What i keep letting happen! Thank you for this video

  45. When I'm enjoying home alone time, and people expect me to be fine when they show up unexpectedly or even at all lol seriously, how dare they ?

  46. I’ve made tremendous progress over the past few years with dealing with issues as they come and living at the moment. I still become overwhelmed. Recommended to all INFJ’s who sometimes need a boost out of their overwhelmed funk:
    When I’m very overwhelmed and unmotivated, I set my kitchen timer for 30 minutes and tell myself that I only need to work for 30 minutes. I’m usually so amazed by how much I get done, I reset the timer for another 30 minutes, a third set, maybe a fourth until I’m feeling totally motivated.
    Once I’ve completed several tasks, naturally, the overwhelmed, anxious feelings have dissipated.

  47. It’s out of the blue but is there such a thing as a Freudian slip in writings?

    At the very end captions of this video, I was expecting to read acoustic, melodic or soft to describe that guitar rift. I mean, I said it once
    and I reiterate; this music is evocative of chilling out on a beach, by the moonlight and a campfire, and as far as in Sihanoukville!
    (Because the beaches in Thailand are too crowded.) To me, there’s nothing melancholic about it!

    ***I recall being a little over two years old and to be completely hypnotized by the music coming from that box. The stereo was integrated in a big piece of furniture which was both a faux fireplace and a cocktail glasses buffet made of dark wood, marble, scarlet velvet and golden patterns. Very much Dynasty inspired. Make no mistake; we weren’t living in a castle. It was a rented two-bedroom second floor walk-up. But my father was thrilled with the pristine wooden floors that were so rare in town. I remember slipping my chubby body behind this big thing and the wall to find out where the singing woman was hiding into the slots. It was warm and dusty with strange lights. Couldn’t find her. This world is so mysterious. I don’t remember what the songs were about but I assume they gave me joy. They brought me far away from my mother’ sadness. This started my short-lived fantasy to become a singer. Every picture of this period shows me singing with a skipping rope as a mic. My faking career lasted no more than three years as the momentum was quickly choked by age five. Perhaps was it because the sadness of mama grew louder than my hopes. It was around the time we went on a little vacation at some women shelter. Mama was once a gifted little girl praised by the nuns’ choir. Since then, her joyful instrument had been silenced by the screams of papa that sounded too much like her own father. As for me, many years of shutting up have passed by up until one day. A very humble but grandiose moment I will always recall. (part 2 elsewhere)

  48. Every single aspect of my life is too stressful. work, family, friends literally every single one of them is stressing me out to the point that I constantly suffer from stomachache and I just want to vanish.

  49. INTJ/INFJ Stress…
    Drama and life or things being out of order. Things don't have to be organized and perfect all of the time, but cannot be overly dramatic or chaotic for too long without being fixed or changed or the INTJ/INFJ will unravel into the likes of which no one has seen before.

  50. Oh my gosh. You just put into words why I’ve been such a mess the past 2 weeks! (And other periods in my life.) THANK YOU! It really helps to understand why my brain is so overwhelmed, it’s an INFJ thing, and I’m not going crazy.

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